First Date Sex: Yes or No?

By Penny Harmon

The question of whether you should have sex on the first date is a question that many women and men have asked themselves time and time again. However, the actual answer to the question is not a clear yes or no. Each individual must take into account their own personality, morals, and character in order to come up with their right answer. But deciding whether to have sex on the first date or not is a difficult thing, especially for women.

Generally, if a man sleeps with a woman on the first date, it's no big deal. He does not have a certain stigma attached to him. However, the man instantly places one on the woman. He, although sleeping with her, believes that she may be, simply put, easy. This is not the case. For example, if a woman feels an instant connection someone, she is more prone to sleep with them on the first date. It may be that she is leading a carefree life and lives by the motto, "If it feels good, do it." Basically, the same motto that a lot of men live by. Sometimes the woman just wants a night of enjoyment-casting emotion aside in order to enjoy the moment. Does this mean she's a "bad" girl? No, it does not. She has adapted to the changes in society where women can behave as men.

Women and men, however, take many chances when sleeping with someone on the first date. Of course, the number one thing is they are taking a chance on getting a sexually transmitted disease. Safe sex is a priority if sleeping with someone on the first date. They are also taking a chance on destroying any chance for the relationship to grow. There are many men and women who will run after sex on the first date. The woman will wake up in the morning and can't believe she behaved that way the night before. Then she'll run, feeling humiliated. Guys, on the other hand, feel that the woman might expect more to the relationship than what there is. They instantly feel the woman will attach herself and not want to be removed because there was sex. This is where things get complicated. Each not knowing what the other is thinking.

If you are on a first date and things are going so well that you think there may be sex later, be up front about it. There is nothing wrong with a woman telling a man up front that if they have sex, she's not expecting a serious relationship out of the situation and vice versa for the man. If you want to behave in a mature way, there is nothing wrong about having a mature conversation about sex before the act. Being up front about what you want is nothing to be ashamed of. If you can handle having sex and not getting all emotional about it afterward, then be mature about it and be up front. However, if you're the type of girl or guy that will instantly feel guilty, remorse, or attached, save the sex for when you get to know somebody better.